mytoystory: do you remember a time when toys were fun?

When you actually, physically PLAYED with your toys?

WORLD WAR THEE

I remember being very physical with my toys (dredge your collective minds out of da gutter folks LOL). I reckon i played as rough as boys (and yes, some girls too) normally do. Muscle-bound He-Man (bootlegs, no less) figures ruled the toy-box. I had the early edition Star Wars figures - I remember clearly: Jedi Luke, Princess Leia, Darth Vader, mayhap even a Boba, and in my stories, they fight. And I mean; bash-your-face-in-kick-your-balls-flung-to-a-corner-of-the-room -sorta fight. With as much full force as a child could muster, within his tiny two hands, monologuing with the full force of his tiny-lungs. The good guys (somehow) always got beaten up. And they were (nearly) always on the left--hand (i think). Sometimes Eternia won. Sometimes the Jedis kicked-ass. But The Sith always had the last laugh ...

TROOPS


MINT-ON-CARD

Of coz you can imagine the state they would have been in after a few years days of rough-housing ... "Blister-Carded"? "Mint-In-Box"? = *RRRRIIIPPPPPP* (seriously, like you'd teach your child to slowly pry-open a carded-toy now? hell, i would if i could! knowing now what we didn't know then LOL). Nevertheless, I think only Jedi Luke and Leia survived my childhood and remain somewhere amidst my myriad boxes of forsaken (but not forgotten) toys, somewhere ... I'm sure of it ... somewhere out there ... beyond the pale moonlight ... nose scrapped, dress sullied, but never missing any limbs (broken? definitely, but never missing ... I think ...)

EDIT: for your amusements and personal horror, they have been found:

LUKELEIA_01

Notice the "whites" around Luke's lapels? they were painted-over
with liquid-paper, to look like a tuxedo - i suppose this was my
first-ever "custom"-figure? LOL

MINT AND COMPLETE

Playmobiles. Man, they were my 1/6th-figures then. They were my muse. I hoarded them like an insane child, constantly made conned my relatives to buy more for me (I was the eldest grandson in the family-tree then *beams*) when my parents were trying their best to not spoil me - but I was young and my more agile mind prevailed (ALL kids are manipulative little turds, don't lie to me LOL).

MAYBE_BABY

I had me my pirates. I had me my spanish troops and knights. My cowboys. My formula-1 racers ... but I realize now, I did not have any "big-sets" - meaning; no castles, no ranch, no pirate ships, no pit-stops ... just sets of soldiers and their gears and horses, with no beds to lay on at the end of a battle-weary day. (as all toys must, at the end of playtime)

But I had me my (bootleg)-Legos. And they became my pirate ships, my castle wall, my Alamo, even my by-default Transformers/mechas (never could afford Transformers toys). I remember being very picky with the colors, which was quite a chore, becoz, really; how many green blocks would I reeeeally need to have as a roving hill for my cowboys to troddle-on? before i realized i could use my bath-towel for the hills instead (well, not exactly MY towel tho ... *WHIP*) ... But there was always a sense of "size" and scale missing ... There wasn't the grandeur of the stormy oceans, or the volcano beyond the roving hills (thank gawd there wasn't any LOTR-toys back then, or i would've literally camped out in the woods LOL)

THY KINGDOM

But I don't remember whining about that tho, or perhaps I knew then to construct my own worlds and space for them to play in. A vivid memory of three (or maybe 6?) chairs, stacked atop each other, with a standing fan at the side, a broom on the other, all covered with my blankie, a gigantic cavernous lair for vampires (or maybe it was the re-enactment of Jedi Luke entering Jabba's lair?) i had cut small little triangles to stick unto the Playmobil's lips; for fangs. heh.

"Playing" was always the fun bit; an action-packed adventure, with whispered conceits or shout-out-loud threats of death and dismemberment ... but getting my ass whipped and clearing up the cavernous lair in the middle of the living room at the end of playtime was always a bit of a bitch lah ... heh.

DIY

i remember making a Colonial Viper fighter-jet out of toilet-rolls. cut up the middle, flip it inside (and it became the pilot's seat). roll-up another three smaller rolls and tape them down the back (rear-thrusters). fold a cone-(ish) and it became the front of the Viper. don't forget the flaps down the sides and back. toilet-rolls. fit a playmobile perfectly. and Battlestar Galactica meets Star Wars when the Viper flies into the cavernous lair that which was the space-slug, hiding from the Imperial Battle-cruisers ...

VIPER_ONE
(note: this is a current replica of what was made decades ago. i have not actually
kept my toilet-roll-Vipers all these years, thank you for understanding)


THAT WAS THEN, BUT THIS IS...

Now? : play with them? are you mad? haven't i told you NOT to touch daddy's/uncle's toys? that one cost me over a hundred bucks! and that one is short-packed! and that one is a very, very rare chase figure! i had to stay up all night to snipe that figure! and that's a custom OOAK-figure, okay? and that one is so rare, sell me you grandmother i also don't want! Display them? where? then gather dust? then the color will fade! then the plastic will turn sticky! then the value go down! how to play? PLAY WITH MY TOYS? ARE YOU INSANE?


sometimes, i just want to build my cavernous lair again, with flying designer vinyl-vampires, kicking-in the nutsack of the villainous rare-chase figure, and watch it being flung across the room, crashing into an Autobot, breaking his leg = all with a satisfied smile on my face and in my heart, rather than a look and feeling of horror, becoz that was an expensive ultra-limited edition chase figure ... "sometimes", anyways ... *heh*.

Do YOU remember a time when you had FUN with your toys?

Cheers,
Andy TOYSREVIL
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