resistance
Gordon Gecko says: "Greed Is Good"
now, for the purpose of this entry, "greed" was exactly what had gotten me into this "situation" in the first place ... when i could've (or "should've") focused on a single (or duo) 1/6-figure bash for an online competition, i ended up with 9 uncompleted troopers instead.
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the deadline is almost up. the morning dawn beckons. iwave my little 1/6th-white-flag and succumb to the lure of restless sleep, unwillingly, i insist ... for tis far too easy to admit defeat or even censor your own abilities, until/unless you get stopped along the way, innit?
how would one ever see the "possibilities", if you close your eyes in the first place?
i realized, that not meeting the deadline, is nothing compared to the silent smile i have within me, for being greedy in the first place to want to even attempt 9, for i could have easily given to "practicality" and just did that one figure, yesterday when i started ... or not even have started at all.
(t'was actually watching Road Warrior the night before that got me jazzed up to start LOL)
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"self-comforting words", im sure as it may read. regardless, im actually glad i was greedy. for without that "hunger", i wouldn't have attempted these 9 men. 9 different characters, all with their own stories, their own struggles, their own demons, their own little make-belief lives. the joy of "creation" is unparalleled, im certain (burst not my naive-bubble now, naysayers of castle-in-the-clouds-dreamers! LOL)
and yet again i resist "common-sense" and "logic", how deliciously foolish of me :p
i allow myself to be "greedy" once again, for i'd wanna be able to do a better job on these guys, for they are far from completed and of my own "expectations" ... and they deserve more than that (yes, i realize im beginning to sound like a loon ... tis 5am, pardon me :p) and yes, they will be in the spotlight "eventually" :)
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in the end, meeting the competition deadline alone did not matter as much as being able to start kitbashing something/anything in the first place (for i've not, for a long time) ... and im glad, for myself (even if it meant narcissistically subjecting y'all to reading an entire post on it ~ *heh* ~ forgive me :p) ... now to finish the darn buggers! *LOL*
now, for the purpose of this entry, "greed" was exactly what had gotten me into this "situation" in the first place ... when i could've (or "should've") focused on a single (or duo) 1/6-figure bash for an online competition, i ended up with 9 uncompleted troopers instead.
the deadline is almost up. the morning dawn beckons. i
how would one ever see the "possibilities", if you close your eyes in the first place?
i realized, that not meeting the deadline, is nothing compared to the silent smile i have within me, for being greedy in the first place to want to even attempt 9, for i could have easily given to "practicality" and just did that one figure, yesterday when i started ... or not even have started at all.
(t'was actually watching Road Warrior the night before that got me jazzed up to start LOL)
"self-comforting words", im sure as it may read. regardless, im actually glad i was greedy. for without that "hunger", i wouldn't have attempted these 9 men. 9 different characters, all with their own stories, their own struggles, their own demons, their own little make-belief lives. the joy of "creation" is unparalleled, im certain (burst not my naive-bubble now, naysayers of castle-in-the-clouds-dreamers! LOL)
and yet again i resist "common-sense" and "logic", how deliciously foolish of me :p
i allow myself to be "greedy" once again, for i'd wanna be able to do a better job on these guys, for they are far from completed and of my own "expectations" ... and they deserve more than that (yes, i realize im beginning to sound like a loon ... tis 5am, pardon me :p) and yes, they will be in the spotlight "eventually" :)
in the end, meeting the competition deadline alone did not matter as much as being able to start kitbashing something/anything in the first place (for i've not, for a long time) ... and im glad, for myself (even if it meant narcissistically subjecting y'all to reading an entire post on it ~ *heh* ~ forgive me :p) ... now to finish the darn buggers! *LOL*