Surviving STGCC 2011: A Personal Experience

One week ago today @ 10 minute before 10am, I was waiting to enter the premises of STGCC alongside my dad, who was my chaperone for this 'momentous' day. At 42 years of age (this year September) I still have a chaperone whenever I step outside of the house, imagine that.
 
'Momentous' because attending STGCC would be one of my most anticipated trip outside of the confines of my home, and my weekly visits to the acupuncturist, since my Stroke in mid-late-October last year. Since surviving my Stroke, I do not go out for tea, or meetup with friends to chat. I have a chaperone with me whenever, to look out for me and to make sure I am safe from harm, or falling or sumsuch recklessness. In time this might change of course, and I had thought going to STGCC would be that 'moment of change'. But I was" wrong" - although not "fully", thankfully.
 
Remembering December 2010 when I visited STGCC for most of a Saturday, I was being pushed around by my sister while I was in a wheelchair. My legs were not as strong and traveling in a massive crowd, well, let's just say I sneaked away to STGCC without my doctors knowing my true intention.
 
This year, I walked into the convention hall with my walking cane, and standing tall, and the point-of-view was pretty different from where my vision was at, and it was invigorating! But alas, thy body's ability and tolerance did not seem to match my personal enthusiasm.
 
LOOK-LOOK SEE-SEE
 
Last year I wore an eye-patch - predominantly because my vision had been affected by Stroke, and I was seeing double of everything. Wearing a patch cut-down on that malady, and I could decently see "single". This year, my eye-sight was much better, and I had chosen not to wear the patch altogether (as I normally no longer, as I am trying to wean myself off it). But the double vision actually persists, but just not as "obvious" this time, and frankly I have sort of learnt to "live with it". 
 
But in reality, amidst thronging crowds and bright-lights, it doesn't work so well. My vision goes (what I call) "crazy eyed" and things tend to be whizzing by pretty fast and frantic, and with my heightened anticipation? Even more frantic. And with frantic visions, came the dizziness (visual senses affect the brain's ability to process and hence affect balance) not for the sake of fainting spells, but general lack of balance - which scarily I have been able to hold at bay for quite sometime now.
 
But it was okay, I survived it decently, although truth be told, I think I missed out on seeing a lot of things. My field of vision is just not as wide and diverse as 'regular' folks, and I am not as fast to react as I did pre-Stroke.
 
WALK-WALK
 
Walking around was a hassle. Most folks do not bother much with a guy-with-a-cane. "He can walk, which means he is okay" seems to be the operating status for most folks, but I must say those who graciously gave way or made way, are excellent conscientious folks.
 
On the first day, I was 'shadowed' by my dad and sister, and for the most part of Sunday, Dad rested at the Cafe point (where I came to and fro with my bags of purchases lol), while Sis went off on her own, and Mum had a mission from me to snap whatever she liked or interested her. That was when I felt the triumph of 'independence' and being able to move "freely" (a term I use very loosely here lol) amongst the crowd, and at my own pace. And it was not hard as I imagined it would be.
 
It also helped that I had attempted to snap pics for event coverage on the first day, and decided to enjoy the event for the most of the second day. So the stress of coverage had by Sunday dissipated to a more carefree time at STGCC, I must admit.
 
TALK-TALK
 
And I am invigorated by conversations with folks. You guys fuel my energy! Your wishes of congratulations of my 'Best Blog' win at the Designer Toy Awards, your concern for my Stroke-recovery. heck even bitching about the event and industry helped spurred me on more than I can muster! Of course there was a price to pay later on, with my dissipated energy, but it was all worthwhile haha
 
BEING A HERMIT
 
I am living a 'sedentary' life, and have been even before my Stroke - for a rough span of 5 years prior - keeping myself to a hermit-like existence while blogging online, and the occasional visits to cover events that I know about and have been invited to. Then post-Stroke, that got even lesser to the extent of non-existent, so being 'alone' has become common place - but the lack of independence is something I am still getting used to.
 
So meeting folks and chatting is awesome! Hell, I am a yakkity-yakker given the chance (no small wonder I was a part-time lecturer for a couple of years not too long ago muahahaha).
 
COVERING THE CON
 
I remember heading into the convention hall on Saturday morning, and decided to check out the Media Village first before covering the con, as I had my laptop slung around me and needed to see what I am able to achieve at this time. And two things happened which altered my plans for event coverage = Meeting Edward of ToysETC and Media Village 'not liking me".
 
Bumped into and met Edward at the entrance, while he was speeding off to an interview (with whom, I did not ask). I had asked him how was the connection, and he mentioned he was relying on his mobile connection instead.
 
At that point, seeing a healthy person "speeding off" to an interview, and having the technically ability to cover the event, literally put me in 'shame'. I currently do not have the dexterity nor energy as I used to have, and well, technically I am lagging badly (Simple equation = Save Money for Stroke-Recovery bills and not splurge on technical needs). 
 
And secondly, the Media Village was PC-based and I was pretty much clueless with my Mac laptop adapting to the surrounds. Right off the bat, even before attending STGCC, I knew I would not be able to cover it like before, or even the way healthy-folks do, but this was a real nail-in-the-coffin.
 
ENERGY-SUCKAGE
 
I had then decided I would have to go home soon, and blog about the event, then return for my 3:30pm on-stage moderating Andrew Bell's Spotlight-panel. My plan was simple - cover as much Artist Alley folks as I could ("friends" and acquaintances always come first) and promote them on the blog as early as possible. Everything else would be taken care of by other folks. Singapore is simply about "brands", and I have no doubt folks would be covering the main booths and thoroughfare in any case (next time I might need to partner up with some folk to share the burden lol).
 
I left the venue before lunchtime and came back for the panel a few minutes before time. The traveling and time spent waiting for image uploading at home (which tests my patience more than being in Stroke, lemme tells'ya!), was major time and energy-suckage. I was quite spent when I reached STGCC again, truth be told. Hell, I even had a hard time walking around after the on-stage panel hahaha
 
I came back to the Con without my laptop - which turned out to be a real boon, as my strength is literally not at it's peak post-Stroke. Heck, not so long ago I was esthetic being about to even hold a plate and wash it at the kitchen sink!
 
If you must understand, Stroke affected the right half of my body, with the right arm and leg both a shadow of their former self - but recovery has been decent well, so I cannot complain (although I find it harder to control my drawing strokes now, as my right hand is my 'master hand" …sigh).
 
And carry a laptop? I must have been frikkin' out of my mind! hahahaha  But I survived it, so tis cool ;p
 
Being burnt out on Day One was not a surprise at all, but a surely a crushing blow to my ego, thinking I was ready to take on the Con, and the World! haha
 
RING-RING
 
My mobile phone was on and ready for all of a few minutes while I was at Suntec City, then when I started taking snaps, I had to off it - because simply put, I could not juggle multiple tasks of holding my walking cane, trying hard to stay still holding my camera to take pics (Unsteady hands post-Stroke) AND answer a goddamned SMS or answer the phone at the same time. People think it's easily done as they are healthily doing it - but no, it is not the same way for me. I missed a heck load of calls and smses for the two days, but you know what? I am sorry I could not reply, and from this moment henceforth I have chosen to stop apologizing for my physical lack to be able to do the things that you do naturally and take for granted. Thanks anyways for thinking of me folks!
 
BTW, my phone is perpetually OFF all the time, thanks!
 
RECOVERY-CONTINUES
 
A week to the day, and I feel I have surprisingly "recovered" moreso that when I helmed my own TOYSREVIL-booth in 2009 (man, that took forever to recover from LOL), and do feel blessed I have been able to meet folks who cared, and yes, actually be able to walk around on my own-ish. And as well I have bags filled with toys bought and gifts from new friends too! As for covering the Con, I have no doubt of my own efforts so far, but perhaps it is an ordeal I might not want to go thru again next year, if my health persists anyways. 
 
I cannot explain this all to everyone, much less be able to convince anyone who actually cared about my health issue. So this is for folks who are interested to know, and hopefully you have a clearer idea, if not of me personally, but how a post-Stroke person reacts to external activity (You are more than welcomed to read my personal blog about living with Stroke at http://stroke41.blogspot.com)
 
Hope you enjoyed the Con tho, I did! See y'all in 2012
 
Cheers
Andy